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The Red Hand Clan | ![]() |
The tribe was started (as all legends are), back in the shrouds of time when James Mac Bond The Third, a warrior bard of no small repute was getting increasingly dissatisfied with his recitations being interrupted by Formorian raiders.
He called forth those brave, foolish or just plain drunk enough to chase the Formor across the lands of Caledonia and Erin back to the western sea. Many tales talk of this deed, most of them made up to disguise the fact that it was just a great day out, the sea breeze was lovely and there was a nice local inn along the shoreline.
Although probably by accident rather than good planning James Mac Bond and his band of warriors did in deed manage to chase the Formorians into the sea (although the Formor still claim to this day that if James Mac Bond had not been singing the one that goes dum diddy diddy diddy dum diddy diddy diddy they would have been able to take him more seriously and thus make a stand).
James Mac Bonds problems only really began, though, when seeing the enemy fleeing under the waves he stopped singing. He turned his back on the sea and faced his men for the applause, but before his encore the Formorian Elite Guard rose from the sea, surrounded James and crushed his body with their mighty blows.
Bloody critics.
As James died he tried to grab his Lyre back from the Formorians, strumming out the last few chords of the one that goes diddy diddy dum dum. His warrior band chased the Formor from the land leaving James Mac Bond The Thirds broken body lying on the sands, with his lyre near him broken stringed and covered in his bloody red hand prints.
Since then they have lived a peaceful life for many years on the furthest western isles becoming a forgotten tribe.
The Red Hand Clan has recently been decimated by a huge Formorian force in 1099 and are now led by the Mac Emily's. In recent years they have moved through the islands of Erin, Orkneyjar and Caledonia as warriors, bards, and chaos beekeepers.
They are easily spotted with their painted red hands, love of ale and song, and bearing a slight scent of honey.

Jander-Kai Gabriel Emily Mac Emily -
Clan Leader, Warrior Mage, and Half Elven Were Bear. He is also the owner of
probably one of the worst tuned guitars you'll ever hear, and collector of names.
Armitage Shanks Mac Fawcett, also known as Lav, but is really the well known schizophrenic Josef Bastablle Bagpuss Mac Emily - Captain of the Bears Beer ship the ' Lady Vantitty'(or he was until he drank it all), Bowmen, Healer (that's a laugh......damager more like), and Chaos Beekeeper.
Vara Mac Emily - Clan Scribe and Warrior. Is famous for shouting those immortal words during each fight '.......well that's it we've almost got them on the ruaaaaaaghhhhhhhh.'
Iona Mac Filly Mac Emily - Clan Mage and the only sensible(ish) member of the clan. Famous for looking worried with all these big nasty monsters around until said big nasty monsters come anywhere near her. Where she seems to have a habit of casting copious spells and bashing them over the head with a 'Havatcha', and then just smugly walking away mentioning how relaxing a weekend of fighting is.

We currently have no army as the Red Hand was decimated
in 1099, although we are still searching for the remnants as there must be more
survivors than just us. Pushed back from the Isles into Caledonia we are always
listening for the rumours of those who made it like us.
Madelaine Mac Emily during 1100 is currently on the Caledonian mainland following up rumours, although rather worryingly we havn't seen her this year.
As for the Naval situation. We were given a ship in 1099, which we modified, called the 'Lady Vantitty' (an unfortunate carving error on Josef's part as the ship should have been called the 'Lady Vanity'). This was taken out of service due to the fact the ship was rubbish. At the present time the 'Lady Vantitty' is home to the Red Hand as we have no lands to call our own on mainland Caledonia.
The 'Lady Vantitty' is not a very heavily armed ship and is quite small. It's main advantage is it's healthy turn of speed (especially when we're running away).
We have recently been trading our Chaos Honey as we have bee hives on the ship and....err ahem......a little privateering, although we are interested in getting into the rescue business, ("depending on the rates" Josef says)
Bapuss - Ships cat (and some think the brains behind the operation). He also ate the last pigeon we were going to send you.
The Admiral and Pottery - The bilge crew. In charge of the small goblin contingent who seem to enjoy life working or should that be shirking on the 'Lady Vantitty'. They generally stay on ship but the Admiral is a bit of a ladies goblin and seems to have one in every port. We're still unsure what he means but no doubt it's something unpleasant.
There are a few more who travel with us from time to time, but it's difficult to commit them to anything as they generally have business all over Edreja and tend to treat the 'Lady Vantitty' as a glorified taxi service.